Hot in Here

Things nobody ever warns you about but probably should:

  1. If you’re going to fill your trunk with things to donate to others — things that no longer spark joy for you (like that pink paisley polyester dress from Bebe you haven’t worn since 1999), but that could still hopefully spark joy for someone else, you’ve got to get your booty in the driver’s seat, put the keys in the ignition, and drive to Goodwill LIKE RIGHT NOW; otherwise, you’ll be driving around town with metal mixing bowls rattling around for months!
  2. The majority of “adulting” consists of paperwork…and biting your tongue.
  3. When the bare skin on your thighs repeatedly rubs together over a long period of time, it really, really hurts.

I’d like to file all of these things under “Lessons I’ve Learned the Hard Way,” especially item number three, which I figured out during my first half marathon. About halfway through, the friction between my bare thighs hurt so bad that I had a minor meltdown. I cried for three miles straight and had visions of the ground opening up underneath me and swallowing me whole.

I can laugh about it now, but it was like a raging garbage fire between my inner thighs at the time.

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